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2 Major Reasons Why You Find it Hard to Forget the Past and Forgive Yourself.


"Ouch!" Her face reacted to the seemingly leathery skin covering a white tissue on the right part of her right knee that drifted off to the wall forcefully.  It was 15 years back she sustained a cut while serving her 5years term in the prison. She decided to turn herself in, when  she couldn't bear the guilt of being one of the accomplice to the rape case of a 17 years old girl, who fortunately escaped before she was raped. 

Turning a new leaf, she moved for Abeokuta. Life became fair to her. Scarred by her past, her mind kept reiterating the girl's plea after deceiving her and took her to be raped by her accomplices.   

She goes through hell and high water trying to forgive herself. As she caresses the scar to ease the pain, her mind didn't let go of the stench of her ugly past.

Making significant progress in life is a function of having a mind that supports your efforts. When the mind is weighed by repugnant stuffs, progress will be far from ones grasp.

It's been reiterated that "the past doesn't determine one's future." Believing this is true, one can still determine his future if his past lurks in His mind, and abrubtly bumb into his thoughts, making him squam. Such, can affect a person and limit him from making significant decisions to lead a better life. Hence, it's a necessity to point out reasons that sponsors this growth and success demeaning attributes.


1. Your Wish To Change the Past.

One of the hardest decision to make, is, "accepting one's past errors." It's only human to keep reiterating regrets but it's no lie that it won't help you live the life you desire. It will mar your efforts to achieve your goals and make significant strides. Hence, efforts needs to be made to get rid of that.

The truth is, you can't change the past but you can use it to better your future needless of how ugly it is. The lady in the story obviously wish she could rewrite the past and have a clear conscience. But the truth is, she can't. Wishes can't rewrite your past but efforts to let go of your past regardless of how latent it is, can change the narrative of your future. 

  • Take out time to visit a therapist.
  • Speak to a credible and trusted person/mentor.
  • Take spiritual counsel and affirm what God says you are, regardless of your past. As a Christian, one personality I know to help a person conquer his past, is the Holy Spirit.
  • This will help also; How to change bad Naratives.

2. Destructive Criticism and Comparison.

When you fail to forgive yourself of your past deeds, you make your mind fall prey of  slavery to limiting beliefs, negative affirmations and destructive comparison. 

When you still blame yourself for past mistakes, you begin to make unnecessary judgements of yourself and compare yourself to others in a demeaning pattern that can lead you to depression or even committing suicide.

Letting go of your past, is showing yourself mercy so you can make progress in life's journey. There's no gain to hurting yourself because of past mistakes. The consequences can be overwhelming yet, with the right help, you can still lead your best life yet.

Final Note

You owe yourself the decision to lead a better and best life yet. Adopting the needed strategies to do this, is a necessity. You can adopt this affirmation to help you conquer your past and make the most out of your life.


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